!!!ATTENTION!!!
EROTIC REINCARNATION
SUSPENDED
UNTIL FURTHER NOTICE
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SIMULATION APPARATUS
TEMPORARILY
OUT OF ORDER
WE APOLOGIZE TO ANY CUSTOMERS EXPERIENCING PERSISTENT FEELINGS OF BEING UNSTUCK FROM SPACE AND TIME IN AN ACCELERATING CASCADE OF SIMULATED DEATH AND REBIRTH ACROSS INCALCULABLE TRILLIONS OF SIMULATED LIFETIMES IN “REALITIES” INDISTINGUISHABLE FROM OUR OWN. THIS MAY APPEAR PERMANENT, BUT WE ARE CONFIDENT THAT IT IS MERELY INTERMINABLE.
PLEASE REMEMBER THAT USE OF THE MICROTRANSACTIONAL SUBSCRIPTION-BASED EROTIC REINCARNATION APPARATUS FOR ACTIVITIES RELATED TO NON-EROTIC SIMULATIONS AND BODY SWAPPING ARE VIOLATIONS OF OUR TERMS OF SERVICE.
IF YOU OR SOMEONE YOU LOVE IS EXPERIENCING SYMPTOMS OF KARMIC INCONGRUITY, WE URGE YOU TO SEEK MEDICAL ATTENTION FROM YOUR LOCAL EROTIC REINCARNATION SPECIALIST AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.
ANNOUNCEMENTS
All products and services related to the algorithmic microtransactional subscription-based erotic reincarnation apparatus have been temporarily suspended.
We regret any inconvenience this may cause.
CURRENT STATUS
We are investigating a potential relationship between user-reported spiritual anomalies and last week's exponential replication calamity. This alarming phenomenon remains poorly understood, is still accelerating, and cannot be reversed or negated despite countless desperate attempts. A dark cloud of helplessness and inevitability haunts our erotic research laboratory.
TEMPORARY INTERRUPTION
OF EROTIC REINCARNATIONS
All users were informed of risk beforehand and per our terms of service are themselves legally responsible for any unintended consequences.
This legal immunity includes but is not limited to experiences involving unexpected or unwanted contact with spectral entities, archons, demiurges, temporal incoherence, mysterious visions of liminal infinities, and spontaneous incursions of non-realities, unrealities, false-realities, or simulated realities.
This technology is safe.